It's Not Time To Worry Yet

Have you ever read To Kill A Mockingbird? Scout will make you laugh, Atticus will make you think, and Tom Robinson will make you cry.

And they should.

Let me tell you, I love me some Atticus Finch. In the book, he tells his children "It's not time to worry yet" as they face the toughest time of their little lives. That is one of my favorite quotes ever. I used to find myself telling myself this all the time. When I was going through something, I remembered this quote. When I found myself worried I remembered this quote. But there's something bigger at work here.

I am a child of God, and for a child of God there's never a time to worry. Easier said than done, though. I was worried ALL the time when the boys were in the NICU. I lived in worry every.single.day. Worry was my constant companion. My go-to-quote didn't even work for me. "It's not time to worry yet;" I would tell myself, "remember Atticus." Yeah, it didn't work.
But you're a Christian; but you're a preacher's wife, for goodness sakes!

Yep, I am and I am. Still didn't work for me.

Here I am fifteen months after the early birth of my children and I can honestly say the worry has stopped. Actually I stopped worrying months and months ago. Love him though I might, it wasn't because of Atticus and his wise words. My faith has grown. I learned to trust God; to take Him at his word; to rely on Him. My husband would tell me all the time when the Peas were in the hospital that this was not about the twins. The experience was for us. And you know what? He was right. We went through that for a reason and there was something that we were supposed to learn. Nothing that we go through is really about us; there's something much much bigger at work.

When Evan had his procedure last week I noticed that something was missing. As I walked down the hall of the hospital after leaving my baby with the doctor, I realized that there was not an ounce of worry. I forgot all about my favorite quote. Daddy P and I even talked about it. He asked me if I cried when I left Evan. Nope. I didn't. But I remember a day....let me tell you! I told him, either I'm going to believe God or I'm not.

I'm not really sure why I'm posting this; I just really felt like I needed to today. Maybe somebody who's reading this needs to know that it's not time to worry. Maybe I need to see these words. I've actually been thinking about this for awhile now.

You should still read To Kill a Mockingbird, though. Harper Lee is a literary genius. The last few pages of the last chapter? Gives me chills every time I think about it! Atticus Finch? Wisest character. EVER. Law students actually study this fictional guy who was based on Lee's father. I think parents should study him too.

So, it's not time to worry yet. But not because Atticus says so.

15 Months!

Yesterday the Peas turned 15 months old! We never adjust their age, but if they were born on time they would have been 12 months old ( their due date was supposed to be September 16th). In honor of them I'm going to share 15 things about Ryan and Evan.

1. THE PEAS ROCK!
2. Ryan loves to carry things around; he always has. He loves to carry my shoes!
3. Ryan loves to give spontaneous kisses. He'll come right up to you out of nowhere and plant one on you. He loves to kiss Evan too!
4. He likes fruit salsa and homemade cinnamon sugar tortilla chips. (check out http://divascancook.blogspot.com/ for the recipe.
5. This boy loves to climb on anything. He is ALL boy!
6. He's not the friendliest person! People come up to them all the time, and Ryan usually has the meanest look on his face. You've got to win this one over.
7. Other times he's all smiles, especially to little girls!
8. He loves to figure out how things work.
9. Evan LOVES his big brother something fierce!
10. Ev is *gasp* a bully sometimes. He takes everything from Ryan. What Evan wants Evan takes. He'll push, pull, hit, and scream to get what he wants. It doesn't matter that there are two of everything around here. He wants the one that Ryan has!
11. He tries to put his pacifier in my mouth all the time!
12. He loves meat!
13. His dad taught him how to do a praise dance. Too funny! I'm trying my best to get them on video!!!
14. Evan is very observant and he tries to imitate everything he hears and sees.
15. Evan isn't a fan of fruits and veggies.


In honor of them turning 15 months old, the Peas got a special treat yesterday. I made fruit salsa and homemade cinnamon sugar tortilla chips (yummy and easy!) for their afternoon snack.
For dinner they had homemade chicken strips and crash hot potatoes (the Pioneer Woman's recipe) and carrots. Since the boys are eating table food now I'm trying to find new recipes. I love trying new foods (Daddy P, not so much!) and I want to expose the boys to as many foods as possible. Now that I have children, I think more about the food that I prepare. I've seen a day when I was the queen of out-of-the-box meals! Better yet, I was the queen of go-out-to-dinner! Now, I try to prepare more of our meals because I know the cook :) and I know what's going in our food. The Peas enjoyed their meal, but I think they enjoyed throwing the remnants of it on the floor better! Way to show your mama you appreciate a home cooked meal, eh!

Cute! Cute! Cute!

Happy "Welcome Home Day," Ryan

One year ago today we welcomed Ryan home. After 89 long days our oldest son was home where he belonged. There was a little back and forth about his discharge date, and he was actually supposed to come about a week before he did. The DAY we were supposed to pick him up we discovered that he had a hernia and it had to be repaired before he could come home. So, September 4th it was. A day we had prayed and waited for. Our Ryan, the Little King, was home at last. This picture was taken right after we got home from the hospital.

His first nap at home!

And here we are one year later. Our big boy is a happy, healthy, smart, sweet, funny, feisty, active one year old! What a difference a year makes! Nobody told me babies grow up so fast!

To celebrate, we bought Ryan a balloon that said "Congrats," hey had a special breakfast this morning, and I made cupcakes for dessert! This was my first time making cupcakes from scratch and they were delicious. I got the recipe from a great blog, http://divascancook.blogspot.com. Check out this blog! You'll find lots of great recipes. I love that she does videos too so you can see exactly how to prepare some of the recipes.

The cupcakes were rainbow colored and Ryan doesn't look too excited to be eating green, yellow, and blue food.

As you can see he got over it! He LOVED his cupcake!

We had a great day celebrating Ryan. Each year we will celebrate Ryan and Evan's "Welcome Home Day." They're too young to understand all this now, of course, but we always want them to know how special they are, not to mention how very very much that they are loved. On their special day each year Ryan and Evan will be able to choose their favorite meal to have, or the family activity that they want to do, or the place that they'd like to go. Of course there will be gifts too! I think its a good thing that they each will have a day that's special. They share a birthday, so they both get to have an extra special day all to themselves. So Ryan, here's to you my sweet boy! Each and every day with you is a tremendous blessing, and we love you more and more each day!

No More (Random) Tears!

The probe is over and we are back home. As I type, Evan is upstairs running around playing with his brother. Everything went as planned. I was able to stay with Evan until they put him under. In total, I would say the procedure lasted 20 minutes or so. When Evan woke up he was FIGHTING mad! They told me to expect him to be cranky, but my goodness! He settled down after a few mintues, drank some milk, and fell fast asleep in my arms. We'll spend a relaxed weekend at home just watching him and making sure he's ok. Thanks for your prayers.

:)

I have been SUCH a horrible blogger lately! Things are quite busy, but that's nothing unusual. I recently started back working, and I have been ty-yurd! Here a few pictures from last week. I finally got a new camera! Now if I could just figure out how to use it...

These two were supposed to be taking a nap. Instead they wanted to share a little brotherly love.

Not sure what was so exciting about this shoe, but Evan climbed in Ryan's seat to check it out.

The boys enjoyed their roasted chicken and mashed potatoes. Ryan is amused with himself because he managed to rip his bib off...again.

Note the food in Evan's hair! They insist on feeding themselves now.

Well it's official. Ryan and Evan are walking! Having TWO walking babies is a lot of work. I mean a lot. A lot, lot. Sometimes I just sit back and watch them and smile. I won't complain at all. I won't ever wish that they'd just sit down. We came too close to not having these moments. That's one thing that prematurity did for me. It made me more thankful, and less whiny. I am in constant awe of these two miracles among us. And I KNOW it's nothing but the Lord.

Please keep Evan in your prayers. On Friday he will have a surgical procedure to open blocked tear ducts. His eyes tear all the time because the ducts are blocked. It's quite common and has nothing to do with being born early. Sometimes the ducts clear on their own, but his would have done so by now if they were going to do it. The longer we wait to have this done the more major the surgery will be. He'd have to be intubated and they'd have to put tubes in if we wait. I've already put it off long enough. This procedure is outpatient and should take about 20 minutes. I think it's similar to what happens when babies get tubes put in their ears. Still, it's a procedure, and we're praying. I'll be glad when it's over so my baby boy can be done with this.